Open Letter to Tribeca Film Festival

Dear Robert DeNiro and Staff,

I attended the 10th anniversary of the Tribeca Film Festival this year for the first time since I began my indie filmmaking career. I was very impressed by the film selection, and yet, I couldn’t help but to observe the obvious omission from your selected film fare: African-American narrative films.

As a storyteller, I enjoy a good story well told. Yet, most films exhibited at festivals or released at box offices reflect a world devoid of people like me: African-American. I became a filmmaker to change that, and I know that there are many other filmmakers like me who decided the same. Yet, your festival seems to contribute to the perpetuity of films devoid of an African-American narrative. Is it the case that there were NO submissions of films reflective of an African-American experience? I find that truly hard to believe.

Of all the films created in our fair country, I am optimistic that a large percentage of them are created by African-Americans. We are a large population of these United States. I am even more optimistic that many of these films are of the caliber of excellence that your festival requires. Yet, here I am writing a letter calling attention to the fact that Tribeca Film Festival did not screen one African-American narrative film written and/or directed by an African-American filmmaker, and asking WHY?

I must say that, as an indie filmmaker, I am disappointed by my first Tribeca Film Festival experience. A film festival that was built from the ground up, only 200 miles from my hometown, failed to showcase films that reflect the world in which I live. Your film selection was garishly void of a narrative that includes people like me. It left me wondering if I should ever attend again, let alone submit my films.

Honestly, I would love to attend the Tribeca Film Festival again next year, and see a few films that not only move me but also include me. Make it happen.

Sincerely,
Nia Malika Dixon
Independent Filmmaker

Chrysalis Web Series Trailer

Jamal has an infant son for whom he provides. He has a family who loves him dearly, and a drug crew who looks to him for leadership.

But, Jamal is conflicted.

He wants to take care of his son, as any father would, yet his choice of career, though it may be easy and lucrative, goes against his spiritual beliefs. He has to either quit the drug game, barely making ends meet, or continue on the path of money, power, and respect at the price of his soul.

A violent altercation triggers a series of events that leave many dead. The violence hits home for Jamal, and when the smoke clears he accepts that he must get out of the drug game. But, will he?

WPFW Interviews Nia Malika Dixon New Year's Eve 2010

Writer-Director Nia Malika Dixon is interviewed about indie filmmaking and her latest project, Chrysalis: An Urban Web Series. Chrysalis was shot over 4 days in Baltimore, MD and is scheduled to begin airing weekly on January 31, 2011. For more behind the scenes and exclusive updates, follow Nia on twitter.com/niamalikadixon, and “Like” the official FB page for Chrysalis: http://bit.ly/hpjZWu

Chrysalis: An Urban Web Series

Day 4: Principal Photography Final Shoot Day

http://bemorecareful.wordpress.com/

Today involved the most complicated action sequences, including a big gunfight in the middle of Mosher Street. In the pouring rain.

Thanks to a wonderful friend of mine (who I’ve known since he was a baby) we shot a robbery/shoot out in a tiny rowhouse apartment in the heart of West Baltimore’s drug district. AND, a major gunfight involving six different actors, two cars, and one monster truck-style, tricked out Chevy Suburban.

We lost a lot of blood. Literally. The rain kept washing away the blood off of my actors and their gunshot wounds.

But, thanks to a superb make up artist, a talented DP, and the patience of neighbors and the local Police Department, we shot an amazing gunfight scene in the pouring rain.

The cast and crew really did a great job. We spent our final day in West Baltimore, and culminated a 4-day shoot with good cheer and a few hilarious, behind-the-scenes moments not sufficient for work.  (Well, your work anyway. LOL.)

Well done, good people. Well done.

http://bemorecareful.wordpress.com/

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/niamalikadixon

if they did a movie on your life, who would you cast to play you?

Jada Pinkett-Smith. She'd be the only one to be able to pull off my tough Baltimore attitude and my vulnerable, artistic sensibilities simultaneously.

Ask me anything

If there was 1 thing you would want people to assume about you upon meeting you, what would it be?

Don't assume. Ask me.

Ask me anything

what is ur fav sports man n dream job?

Ray Lewis is hands down my fav sports man, & I'm working my dream job right now: Indie Filmmaker.

Ask me anything

Why "The Town" Is Such a Good Film

The Town is not just about a group of bank robbers in a town famous for its gifted bank robbers. This movie is about the primal dynamic that exists between Man and Woman. Yes, there’s a lot of heist action, and heat from the law, but it’s a lot about how men and women need each other to survive. (It’s also a little about how men rely upon each other, as explored through Doug’s relationship with best friend, Jem. But, that is a whole other conversation.) The Town subtley hones in on that age-old interdependence between man and woman, and leaves the audience feeling a myriad of powerful emotions along the way.

Movies often reflect our own world; display a refraction of our current reality. The Town does this with cinematic flair, and dialogue that leaves its mark. Ben Affleck’s stunning turn in the director’s chair affected me in a major way, with the story of a man who wants to break free of a life that is drowning him.  Doug MacRay, portrayed by Affleck, had already been looking to get out of the life of crime he was living when he meets the woman who helps him to finally break free. Claire is the bank manager unwittingly held hostage during one of Doug’s bank heists. She is the only person who can send Doug and his gang to prison, but thanks to the douchebaggery of Frawley, the FBI agent leading the case, she isn’t too eager to cooperate with the federal lawmen after them.

Doug still feels compelled to keep an eye on Claire, just in case she has a change of heart, and soon finds himself drawn to her. After getting to know each other, Doug and Claire find a natural attraction develop between them. She is everything that he needs: innocent, in need of protection, and very much unlike his world. Claire welcomes the needed strong arm of protection that Doug offers, and falls in love with him because of it. They fit together like a lock and key. However, the pull of Doug’s life comes over him like waves tugging him back out with the tide. His former girlfriend, and his best friend’s sister, Krista (portrayed by Blake Lively) needs him too; in the same way that Claire does. She goes out of her way to try and keep him, even using her body as her weapon of choice. Yet, Doug has already decided that he needs to break free of Krista, and the world in which she lives.

Of course, this is a heist movie and there is a huge score to be had. One last robbery to give Doug the money he needs to escape, with Claire. But, Krista proves to be at the end of her rope and when her begging doesn’t work on Doug, she is more than willing to cooperate with the lawmen that are after Doug and his gang.

Krista gives insight to a phenomenon that pervades our culture. She like so many women, are in the position of ‘use or be used.’ And, it’s usually both. The women in this film have little to no power. It’s reflective of society. Women are to be protected. Claire is kidnapped to ensure the escape of Doug’s gang, used by the feds to catch the bank robbers, or being used by Doug (Yes, he is using her.) as a way to escape his current life. Krista is left to fend for herself in that world of crime and poverty where the men treat the women like objects. 

Even her own brother, Jem, is quick to use her and her daughter as a way to keep Doug from leaving town. Krista tries to utilize the only power she thinks she has: sex. But that doesn’t work because she doesn’t have the most important thing Doug needs: a way out. He’s already moved on to another woman to use. So, in the end, Krista plays herself and becomes the mastermind behind her own undoing. She’s even smart enough to recognize this when she utters the most memorable line in the film for me to Agent Frawley: “Why is it I’m always the one who gets used?” You can’t fault her for trying. She’s playing the cards she was dealt. Her hand just wasn’t as good as Claire’s.

Gender roles are what they are. It’s a man’s world. Women are more often than not, limited by their circumstances. The deck is stacked against them. So many women try so very hard to change that, yet fail to realize that it’s not the game that’s flawed. It’s the way they play the game that’s screwing them over. It’s the smart woman that figures this out, and devises a way to play the game, at the same rules, yet come out on top without being used. That’s the dynamic. Men and women will forever be engaged in this dance of use and be used.

This is why The Town is such a good film. It not only explores the primal theme of survival in harsh times, it simultaneously delves into that long-standing love/hate relationship between man and woman. That makes for an action-packed, drama-filled film that keeps your heart racing from beginning to end.

Understanding Inception

Disclaimer: The following is an exercise in cerebral masturbation. Proceed at your own risk.

Warning: If you haven’t seen the film, shame on you. It’s a work of art. Go see it, and read no further. Come back after you’ve watched the film.

If you’ve seen the film, you already have an idea of what you think it’s all about. And, although it’s clever that many reviewers are comparing themes addressed in Inception to that of the process of filmmaking, I believe there’s more to it than that. Here’s what I think: Inception addresses themes of understanding oneself, and recognizing the artistic process of creating and perceiving. As an artist, scientist, teacher, and philosopherInception blew my mind.

“But, it had never occurred to me that everything I’m saying about creating a thing and trying to perceive it at the same time…relates to the filmmaking process.” –Christopher Nolan ¹

There are so many theories circulating regarding the meaning of the film Inception. Upon my first viewing, my theory was solid in my mind during the warehouse scene in which Eames demonstrates to Arthur that he“musn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.”

The entire film is a dream. Dom Cobb has been dreaming, and everyone in the film is a projection of his subconscious. Dom and Mal explored dream sharing, dreams within dreams, and she realized that even though they thought they woke up from several dream layers, she and Dom were still asleep. Until she jumped off the building. (She’s awake somewhere and waiting for him to wake up.)

The one thing that solidified this idea for me was the line that Mal (a projection of Dom’s subconscious at the time) uttered in the infamous hotel room: “No creeping doubts? Not feeling persecuted, Dom? Chased around the globe by fictitious corporations…” Even his own subconscious is trying to tell him he’s still dreaming.

Each character is an aspect of his own subconsciousness, of his identity. Ariadne is his most recent fragment, and throughout the film, her goal has been to expose Dom to the rest of the team, to himself, really. Think about it, Dom is the one who used “inception” on Mal to save her from the dream world. He’s clever enough to know deep down inside that he’s still dreaming. (But, I think Dom is okay with that in the end. He let Mal go, and he “returns” home and finally allows himself to be “reunited” with his children.)

But, really, this is just a theory. It’s my interpretation. Just as you look at a work of art and see and feel one thing, and I look at the same work of art and see and feel something else, Inception is a different experience for everyone. Even for Christopher Nolan.

Nolan is the artist, and as such, I’m inclined to think that in many ways, he is Dom Cobb. And, in many ways, we all are. Inception is our story. This is why Inception is so beautiful and brilliant. It’s a well-layered, emotionally resonant and relevant story, that’s universally relatable. (And, intellectually stimulating.) “If you’re going to do a massive movie, though, you’ve got to be able to unlock that more universal experience for yourself as well as for the audience.” –Christopher Nolan ² This is the stuff artists dream of achieving.

“They say we only use a fraction of the true potential of our brains… but they’re talking about when we’re awake. While we dream, the mind performs wonders.” ~Cobb

“In a dream your mind continuously does that… It creates and perceives a world simultaneously. So well that you don’t feel your brain doing the creating.” ~Cobb

As an artist, I’ve been striving toward this both consciously and unconsciously. Creating and perceiving simultaneously. The opening up of the flood gates of the creative mind, allowing pure creation to exist free from restraints, is the closest thing to Nirvana. These restraints are usually fears; of judgment (external and internal), of invalidation, imperfection, second-guessing, failure, success… You get the picture.

As a scientist, I’ve always been fascinated by the human brain. I’ve always considered it akin to a computer. The mind has infinite power, capable of simultaneously maintaining human homeostasis, governing thought, processing information, creating and communicating ideas, etc. The human brain is exponentially capable of so much.

As a teacher, I subscribe to the theory that metacognition is the epitome of learning. Being aware of learning as it happens is a high, if not the highest, level of understanding.

As an epistemologist, I continue to study Russell, Ryle, Gettier, Piaget, Vygotsky, Skinner, Kohlberg, and even Einstein. I do thoroughly enjoy analyzing knowledge and how it relates to truth, belief, and the concept of the human understanding of reality.

As it relates to epistemology, the entire film is an exercise in introspection. Dom Cobb is on a constant loop of self-observation, reasoning, and examining his own thoughts of what he believes to be truth. Believe it or not, the sciences of knowledge and human development pervade Nolan’s script. Cobb is, in fact, obsessed with understanding human thought and behavior. Eames, seems to be a connoisseur regarding human understanding and the development of ideas. His insight subtly drives the mission toward inception of the idea intended for Fischer to adopt. (But, according to my theory that Eames is simply a projection of Cobb, it’s still Cobb who is the connoisseur.)

So, viewing Inception was a brainy orgasm of sorts for me. All these concepts are explored and expounded upon in a visually stunning and emotionally riveting film-watching experience.

After seeing the film a second time, something in my mind clicked, and a door unlocked on my vault of ideas. The door that had been locked (due to several of the aforementioned fears) was opened, and a small crash of waves of creativity washed ashore in my mind regarding my latest script. I realized something: The act of creating is something that I have no control over, and to attempt to control it is the equivalent of locking it away.

I believe the artist’s best way to create is to do so as if in a dream, to live in that moment of creating and perceiving as if in a dream, to allow the ideas to form naturally from the subconscious. I want to be standing in the center of that circle that Cobb drew for Ariadne when he explained how the mind performs when we dream.

That’s what Inception is about. Inception is a work of art reflective of Nolan’s desire to create and perceive simultaneously. “That’s the whole thing you’re trying to do: You’re literally presenting this thing in which you’ve put words into people’s mouths, and you’re trying to watch it as if you’re fresh to it.” –Christopher Nolan ³

Artists are dreamers. We have to remember that. We are the dreamers.

Notes:

1. Warner Bros. Entertainment. Inception The Shooting Script. p. 19. California: Insight Editions, 2010. Print.

2. Warner Bros. Entertainment. Inception The Shooting Script. p. 11. California: Insight Editions, 2010. Print.

3. Warner Bros. Entertainment. Inception The Shooting Script. p. 19. California: Insight Editions, 2010. Print.

The 2009 Crystal + Lucy Awards

On the evening of Friday, June 12, 2009 I was nervous and excited. That morning, on my way to work, I stopped at the newsstand I pass every morning on Robertson and Pico and bought The Hollywood Reporter. There I was on page 14: "Writer Nia Malika Dixon joined Women In Film after relocating from Baltimore to Los Angeles 3 1/2 years ago."

That evening, at the Hyatt Regency Century Plaza Hotel, I marveled at the wonder that is the 'red carpet.' I was amazed that everyone knew my name. Someone asked me if I was wearing MaxMara. Someone yelled, "Nia! Over here!" The flashing lights were dizzying, and I was transported to another world. The red carpet was an adrenaline rush, thrill ride. I see how addictive it can become. It's a new kind of scary fun that I think I like.

The 2009 Crystal + Lucy Awards proved to be a huge milestone for me. I was recognized for my participation in the Women In Film Mentor Program, with talented director Catherine Hardwicke. My mentor, Catherine Hardwicke, was honored with The Dorothy Arzner Director's Award. Dorothy Arzner (http://www.cinema.ucla.edu/collections/Profiles/arzner.html) was the first woman inducted into the Director's Guild of America. Along with this, actress Jennifer Aniston was recognized with the Crystal Award for her efforts to expand the role of women within the entertainment industry. Holly Hunter received the Lucy Award, named for innovator Lucille Ball, for her accomplishments in television and film. Cinematographer Petra Korner received The Kodak Vision Award for excellence in a field hugely dominated by men. And, Elizabeth Banks (one of my favorite actresses) was recognized as The MaxMara Face of the Future.

I was in the company of greatness. I joined Women In Film because I wholeheartedly believe in the mission of providing opportunities for women to excel in an industry dominated by men on all levels; creative, technical, executive, etc. Sitting at my table, I could not help but feel pride for not only the women being honored that night, but the women who made such a night possible and the women who are inspired by them all.

I enjoyed watching the showcases of each honorees' work, and hearing professional colleagues reflect on their hard work and dedication. Each woman emanated poise, persistance, and most importantly, purposeful drive. Film, television, and all media is ameliorated by women like these.

The mission of Women In Film is to help women achieve their highest potential within the global entertainment, communications and media industries and to preserve the legacy of women within those industries. I'm a major part of that mission. I'm on my way to create films, and other entertainment media, that push the envelope and shift the paradigm for the entertainment industry. I may have lofty goals, but I'm in the company of women who've proven to the world that women are a source of greatness, and that lofty goals are simply reality waiting on my hard work to nurture it to unfold.

My favorite part of the evening was not when I was onstage, (which is running a close second) being introduced by Chelsea Handler, (who I think is one of the funniest, classiest women on television; yes, I said classy) nor was it when I was backstage standing next to Jodie Foster, (who is just amazing!) but when Debbie Allen, Piper Laurie, and Lupe Ontiveros were honored onstage. These phenomenal women have careers that span decades, and they were inducted into the Legacy Series. They inspired me the most.

It was a wonderful night, and as I left, so many people stopped and told me I was amazing onstage, and congratulated me on my recognition. It took me a while to realize that everyone was impressed by me. At first, it felt as if they were speaking about someone else. As if it was a message for me to relay to a friend. But, then my date for the evening, (and friend) said to me, "It's just like you said to me: accept it." I do accept it, and I use it as my fuel to continue pushing forward to BE and DO great things.

I Don't Care How Much Money His Movies Make

Blaxploitation has evolved and its name is Tyler Perry Studios. That's right, I said it. I have a right to dislike something, no matter how much the masses love it. People enjoyed blaxploitation films, too. (See Quentin Tarantino.)

But, I'm a filmmaker (and film watcher) who does not enjoy being pandered to, being hit over the head with negative black stereotypes, or being forced to endure stilted inauthentic dialogue.

To quote Common, "I ain't relating. If I don't like it, I don't like it, that don't mean that I'm hating."

In the March 20th issue, Entertainment Weekly published an article that explores the phenomenon that is Tyler Perry and his films. One point brought forth is quoted from Todd Boyd, professor of critical studies at USC School of Cinematic Arts: "All his productions demonize educated, successful African-Americans. It's a demonization that has long existed in certain segments of the black community." (See "light-skinned vs. dark-skinned, good hair vs. nappy hair, house negro vs. field negro, etc.)

According to the article, Perry's films reflect the thinking of many working-class African-Americans, and dare I say it, uneducated African-Americans. In Madea Goes to Jail, the ambitious, light-skinned female district attorney is a snob, and a conniving, corrupt criminal. Conversely, the most sympathetic character is the darker-skinned, strung out prostitute. Go back to some other films and see the paradigm for yourself.

But, no one will deny the money being made and the jobs being created. Perry's opening up the world of film and giving voice to African-Americans in films and filmmaking that has not been there before. Too bad it's just not my voice. In fact, I don't know anyone personally whose voice he's reflecting in these stories. Who are these mysterious populations of people?

Donald Bogle, author of Toms, Coons, Mulattoes, Mammies, & Bucks: An Interpretive History of Blacks in American Films is quoted in the Entertainment Weekly article as saying, "Tyler Perry understands that much of his audience is African-American women--the most ignored group in Hollywood--so he's doing movies that speak to them."

I'm an African-American woman, and Tyler Perry is definitely not speaking to me. I'm not entertained by a story where a black prince (usually a hard working man's man) rescues a frustrated, unhappy, and/or abused black woman. Personally, I feel like the frustrated, unhappy, and/or abused black woman needs to get a backbone and change her life choices, because there is no such thing as a prince charming; black, white, brown, red, or yellow.

The actors are not saying much. According to the article, nine declined to be interviewed for the story. One actor is quoted as saying, "There just aren't enough roles out there for black actors and even fewer for black actresses, so if someone is going to give you a job, you're going to do it, even if you think it's substandard." Regarding writers, it might be best to leave that stone unturned. It may open a HUGE can of decomposed worms regarding union representation and benefits.

Perry is quoted as saying, "After Obama became president, I realized that black people could not have put him in the White House-- it had to be a collective effort of everybody in the country. My fan base crosses all ages, all cultures, all classes." I guess everybody loves a good, stereotypical comedy.

Well, just as Nelson George, author of Blackface: Reflections on African-Americans and the Movies, and the memoir City Kid, says, "Comedy and stereotypes go hand in hand. That's why intellectuals have a hard time with humor."

I guess I'm too intellectual to understand the comedy. This all takes me back to when I was a little, scrawny kid in the 'hood, and everybody called me a wannabe and said I "talked white". And, just like back then, I'm thinking, "No, I guess I'm just not cool enough to dumb it down."

The Film

Will you see this film?

Why? I'm wondering why some films do well at the box office, and others don't. I'm starting to think that audiences are not as picky as they should be. As a storyteller, I aim to entertain and enlighten. But, lately, most films do more manipulation of emotion than enlightenment and entertainment.

Madea films are BIG box office draw. Is it because people can't resist laughing at a six-foot black man in drag?

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is another popular film. Why? Are audiences suckers for a sad, love story that pulls on your heart-strings as unmercifully as kids at tug-of-war? Never mind that this story will suck four hours of your time, and leave you emotionally exhausted. It's a love story between Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett!

This film has grossed over $80M to date. People keep flocking to it. Taken is literally an emotional roller coaster ride, for parents of teenaged girls. Beware sending your daughter on trips to Paris, for she may be kidnapped and sold into slavery. But, this is what you could do if you were an ex-government agent with a set of skills to render vengeance upon the evil bad guys. Again, emotional manipulation.

I suppose there is one shining light in the arena of film lately. Slumdog Millionaire has garnered much attention and many accolades. It is the story of a young man poised on the brink of drastically changing his life, by winning millions on a trivia game show. The storytelling is well layered, and literally draws you into another world. It's a love story, and a life story. The film truly enlightens and entertains. Filmmaking at its best. This film deserves to receive high honors, and I hope it wins the Oscar for which it's nominated. It is the Best Film of 2008.

Our Crimes Against Humanity, Our Crimes Against Ourselves

The Oxford English Dictionary defines it as:
1. humankind. 2. the condition of being human. 3. compassion or benevolence

Merriam-Webster defines it as:
1: the quality or state of being humane 2 a: the quality or state of being human b: (plural) human attributes or qualities

Dictionary.com defines it as:
1. all human beings collectively; the human race; humankind.

2. the quality or condition of being human; human nature.

3. the quality of being humane; kindness; benevolence.

By its very definition, the word humanity postulates that the true embodiment of being human is to be kind, benevolent, and humane.

Yet, we, all human beings collectively, are a party to the murder and bloodshed of our own kind. What have we done while our humanity ebbs away with every passing moment as more people are brutally murdered, raped, and tortured?

In our homes, our soft comfortable havens of warmth and protection, we are far away from the atrocities of Darfur, where a poor farmer cannot bury his eldest son who has died in his arms from gunshots to his back. We are not there as our human brethren ravage his village, burning down homes, killing men and children, raping girls and women.

John Holmes, the U.N. top humanitarian official, states that sexual violence, growing malnutrition, human rights abuses and attacks on humanitarian convoys are all adding to an already serious situation in Darfur. as many as 100,000 more people may have died in Darfur over the last two years as a result of violence, disease and malnutrition.
"A study in 2006 suggested that 200,000 had lost their lives from the combined effects of the conflict," said John Holmes. "That figure must be much higher now, perhaps half as much again."
He explained later his figures were only an estimate and not an official U.N. figure. [i]

The UN says that more than two million of the estimated six million population have fled their homes, but the organisation is reluctant to suggest how many might have died in total.
Some analysts are estimating that the true death toll could be four or five times higher than the 70,000 figure. [ii]

As you watch your television set, surf your internet, or play your video games, rockets launch missiles that destroy schools full of children in Gaza. Soldiers drop bombs and shoot artillery at men, women, and children as they run from their homes fleeing exploding buildings, rapid gunfire aimed at their heads, and jets armed with guided missiles.

Israeli mortar shells exploded Tuesday near a U.N. school in Gaza sheltering hundreds of people displaced by Israel's onslaught against Hamas militants, killing at least 30 Palestinians, tearing bodies apart and staining streets with blood. Israel's military said its shelling was a response to mortar fire from within the school, pressing its assertion that Hamas militants are using civilians as cover. Two residents of the area who spoke by telephone said they saw a handful of militants firing mortar shells from a street near the school.

"There's nowhere safe in Gaza. Everyone here is terrorized and traumatized," said John Ging, head of Gaza operations for the United Nations Relief and Works Agency. [iii]

In Mexico and Guatemala, people are being murdered as a result of greed and drugs.

In Northwestern Mexico, ten victims of violence attributed to the ongoing war between rival narcotics gangs and the Mexican government were found near Tijuana and Culiacán. Four of the bodies were decapitated, according to local law enforcement. Police at Tijuana, which borders California, were alerted to four of the bodies and found the separated heads in plastic bags nearby overnight on January 8, 2009. Three of the victims were minors. [iv]

Representing over 143 distinct parishes, Catholics and other Christians converged upon the colonial era church protesting their fatigue over murder, rape, abductions, drug addiction and drug-related violence. Incursions of Mexican drug cartels, bolstered by violence committed by Central American gangs called “maras” have caused a feeling of insecurity throughout Guatemala, which already has a legacy of violence and killing left over from a decades-long civil war. A recent survey showed that 78 percent of Guatemalans polled are afraid to go out in the street, while 90 percent fear kidnapping. [v]

Iraqi families struggle to find safety and sanity amidst the gunfire and hate.

Blackwater, which is responsible for the protection of hundreds of American and other foreign officials in Iraq, says the guards' convoy came under attack from insurgents. Eye witnesses and family members maintain that the shooting was unprovoked. "I was driving. My sister was beside me in the car," said businessman Mohammed al-Kinana, who lost his son in the tragedy.

"Her three children were in the back seat and my son was directly behind me. My sister grabbed my head to pull me down. Those men, they just kept shooting and shooting. "They shot in all directions. At the trees. At the police hut. They kept shooting at the first car until it burst into flames."

In that first car to reach the intersection were Mahasin and Ahmed al-Rubaie, wife and son of Dr Haythem Ahmed al-Rubaie. Ahmed was shot, then his mother died from gunfire while she was cradling her son in her arms. [vi]

In Liberia, men, women, and children suffer disease and pain due to multiple gunshot wounds left untreated after a decade-long war.

Tenneh Dolocon was under one year old when she was shot during the height of fighting in 1996. Strapped to her mother's back, she took two bullets – one passed through her shoulder, the other lodged in her thigh. For most of her childhood Dolocon suffered chronic infections. In 2006, she was diagnosed with osteomyelitis, characterised by infected tissue migrating towards bone. Doctors at Mercy Ships, an international medical charity that operates a fleet of hospital ships, operated to remove the dead tissue and the bullet lodged in her thigh. [vii]

Bosnian families still suffer the scars of horrible genocide.

Ten years after the war in Bosnia ended we have come back with Channel 4 news to meet the forgotten victims of sexual violence. Despite the widespread publicity concerning the atrocities committed during that time little has been done to help the thousands of women who suffered extreme sexual violence and torture, or the children born as a consequence of this abuse.

Abandoned by the state, many of these women are not only traumatised by their horrific experiences but also impoverished. Cast out from their communities, often abandoned by their husbands, few of them can hold down jobs. Only a handful have received compensation for their suffering, which continues in the form of nightmares, physical injury and mental ill-health.

"I was raped for over a year by Serbian soldiers," says Mirella, a softly spoken woman of 33. "They kept me prisoner in my house and raped me day and night in front of my children. When I became pregnant I had an abortion - I never told my husband about it or about the other terrible things that happened, although I'm sure he knows." [viii]

And, more in many other places worldwide…

War, bloodshed, murder.

As human beings, our true nature is to have compassion and love, and yet we choose to harbor such hate, worldwide.

A morality tale told for centuries tells of an individual, a part of a minority. In an effort to stand up for himself, he declared himself better than the rest. Based upon contempt and self-pride, he chose hate.

And, Satan said, “I will assuredly lie in wait for them on your straight path. Then, I will come to them from before them and behind them, from their right and their left, and you will not find most of them as thankful ones.”

Our humanity is at a loss. We are bargaining it for self-pride. We have traded it in for hate. Will you do nothing to end the deceit? Are you a party to the flim-flam? Can you live with such a shady deal?


[i] Margaret Besheer , United Nations, “UN Says Situation in Darfur Worsening, Deaths Mount”, www.voanews.com, April 22, 2008
[ii] Russell Smith, “How many have died in Darfur?”, BBC News, http://www.news.bbc.co.uk/, Feb. 16, 2005
[iii] “Israel OK's Gaza "Humanitarian Corridor"”, http://www.cbsnews.com/, Jan. 6, 2009
[iv] Martin Barillas, “Thousands demand end to violence in Guatemala”, http://www.speroforum.com/, Jan. 11, 2009
[v] Martin Barillas, “Twenty dead so far in Mexico drug war for 2009”, http://www.speroforum.com/, Jan. 8, 2009
[vi] Humphrey Hawksley, “Bitterness at Blackwater Shootings” BBC News, http://www.news.bbc.co.uk/, Dec. 8, 2008
[vii] “Liberia: War Wounds Left To Fester”, http://www.irinnews.org/, Jan. 12, 2009
[viii] Kate Holt and Sarah Hughes, “Bosnia's rape babies: abandoned by their families, forgotten by the state”, www.independent.co.uk , Dec. 13, 2005

I Was Harrassed By Police and all I got was...

Traumatized. If you've never been harrassed by police, like I'd NEVER been, you may have a similar reaction.

Post traumatic stress disorder.

I had the worst case of writer's block in all my life as a result. I shut down subconsciously, and began living in fear of all things unknown. And, I didn't know how to come out of it. I'm still recovering.

Honestly, one day at a time is not a cliche. I'm able to get past the experience because of all the days that have followed that fateful day when one racist police officer decided to turn his anger and frustrations into a weapon against me.

The devil may have his due, but my triumph is the peace I have found despite such ugliness.

My writing will continue.

People Are Strange

"Don't be in a hurry to condemn because he doesn't do what you do or think as you think or as fast. There was a time when you didn't know what you know today." ~Malcolm X, a.k.a. Malik Shabazz

As time goes by, I interact with so many different kinds of people, and it amazes me.

People are like snowflakes. There are no two exactly alike, yet, each is complex and beautiful.

When I was really little, before I had 13 siblings, I always wanted a friend who was just like me. I was an only child, but I was a social butterfly. Unfortunately, it got me into trouble, because I was always in "grown folks' business."

So, I used to have a make-believe friend that lived on the other side of the world who would think like me, act like me, and look like me. When I got older, I realized that I was seeking a doppelganger, an alter-ego. Well, my mom remarried, had a bunch of kids as did my dad, and my make-believe friend disappeared.

I never stopped seeking a doppelganger. But, I realized that it didn't matter. I recognize the beauty in people as snowflakes. I learn so much about myself and others from my new friendships, and through meeting so many different kinds of people.

"O Mankind, We have created you from male and female, made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the best among you in the sight of God is the one who is pious and loves God much. Verily, God is All-Knowing, All-Aware." ~The Noble Qur'an, Chapter 49, Verse 13

You know, eventually I gave birth to my doppelganger. I'm absolutely amazed by my child. She astounds me everyday, and I'm blessed with the privilege of being her mother. My mother, and all my friends tell me all the time that she is just like her mother. My very own Mini-Me. All I can say to that is, "Be careful what you wish for." :)

My Favorite Lyrics This Week:

People Are Strange

~by The Doors

People are strange

when you're a stranger

Faces look ugly

when you're alone

Women seem wicked

when you're unwanted

Streets are uneven

when you're down

When you're strange

Faces come out in the rain

When you're strange

No one remembers your name

When you're strange

When you're strange, when you're

Strange

People are strange

when you're a stranger

Faces look ugly

when you're alone

Women seem wicked

when you're unwanted

Streets are uneven

when you're down

When you're strange

Faces come out of the rain

When you're strange

No one remembers your name

When you're strange

When you're strange, when you're

Strange

When you're strange

Faces come out in the rain

When you're strange

No one remembers your name

When you're

Strange

Where Have All The Smart Men Gone?

I often wonder what will become of Mankind, when many of our "so-called leaders" have taken a permanent brain vacation.

Who shall come to free us from the ignorance that has invaded our country?

It's an epidemic run rampant, and there is no hope in sight.

Unless, we elect an INTELLIGENT POTUS this time around...

(And, I don't mean Hillary.)

(And, I damn sure don't mean McCain!)

Ambitious Notions of Existential Importance

"We all know sometimes life's hates and troubles, can make you wish you were born in another time and space. But you can bet your life times that and twice its double, that God knew exactly where He wanted you to be placed." ~Stevie Wonder

I have Asthma.
It sucks.
I haven't really been well lately, but, I'm better.

And, a lot has been on my mind. The notion that I have that my empirical knowledge has been leading me forward in life, has really been buzzing about in my mind lately.

I mean to say, based upon my own life experiences, I learn and grow and achieve a sort of development in my own existence.

But, I think that's bullsh*t. Well, in a way...

Because everything I am is a culmination of my understanding of experiences, and yet, my experiences are a creation of God. God created me, and created my circumstances, therefore, I am a product of God. And, my experiences are a product of God.

And all of this is important, why? You might ask yourself.

Because, in a wordy way, I'm simply stating the obvious: my knowledge and experiences are not that which make me who I am, but GOD makes me who I am. And, so I must thank God. :)

It all comes back to God.

So, don't get lost in all the sauce.

My Favorite Lyric this Week:
Pastime Paradise
~by Stevie Wonder

They've been spending most their lives
Living in a pastime paradise
They've been spending most their lives
Living in a pastime paradise
They've been wasting most their time
Glorifying days long gone behind
They've been wasting most their days
In remembrance of ignorance so disgraced
Tell me who of them will come to be
How many of them are you and me

Dissipation

Race relations

Consolation

Segregation

Dispensation

Isolation

Exploitation

Mutilation

Mutations

Miscreation

Confirmation...
to the evils of the world

They've been spending most their lives
Living in a future paradise
They've been spending most their lives
Living in a future paradise
They've been looking in their minds
For the day that sorrows gone from time
They keep telling of the day
When the savior of love will come to stay
Tell me who of them will come to be
How many of them are you and me

Proclamation

Of race relations

Consolation

Integretion

Verification

Of revelations

Acclamation

World salvation

Vibrations

Stimulation

Confirmation...
to the peace of the world

They've been spending most their lives
Living in a pastime paradise
They've been spending most their lives
Living in a pastime paradise
They've been spending most their lives
Living in a future paradise
They've been spending most their lives
Living in a future paradise
We've been spending too much of our lives
Living in a pastime paradise
Let's start living our lives
Living for the future paradise
Praise to our lives
Living for the future paradise
Shame to anyone's lives
Living in the pastime paradise

Moment of Clarity

"Thank God for granting me this moment of clarity." ~Jay-Z

I have come upon a milestone. I've hit upon an epiphany. I'm no longer Sisyphus.

I am Athena.

No Ordinary Love

What is LOVE really?

Damned if I know!

Wait, I think I have an idea. It can mean so many things...

I LOVE the way God takes care of me. He LOVES me unconditionally.

I LOVE my Mommy. She is the only human being that I put before all others, except God.

I LOVE my children, and the LOVE they have for me is immeasureable.

I LOVE my puppy, Sugar. She LOVES me unconditionally, even when I don't take her for a walk when she whimpers at me through the screen door.

I understand LOVE to be something that comes from surrender. I mean, I surrender my will to God's. I trust that my faith in Him is sufficient for me, and He provides all I need.

Love is not something to be bargained. It must be given freely. And, in turn, it will be received. The more you give, the more you receive.

Love is a gift. You can't buy it, though.

Love is something of which this world needs a whole lot more.

Spread the love.

Give love.

Be love.